Thursday, September 24, 2009

And months later... Another one!

So, I started this blog thinking it would be a fun way to recount all the ridiculous moments of life and then my life got so ridiculous I could never find time to do it! But, it's a brand new day and I have something to say!

I wish you suckers could see the ridiculous bruise that has sprouted up on my inner thigh from, I suppose, when I pulled a muscle in yoga the other day. It is literally the size of my entire hand. It's totally insane. I can't believe I injured myself doing yoga. Crazy.

Have you seen GLEE?! Holy. Crap. It is the funniest show EVER and it almost perfectly resembles my senior year of High School. Well, maybe not perfectly, but in my mind, totally.

When I graduated college, I was so excited. I have never wanted to be done with anything so badly in all my life. But, it's weird, because now, only a month or so after the fact, I miss it. I miss the sort of structure and the gratification of doing a task and getting feedback and feeling like I'm a part of this collective struggle to be and do bigger and better things. aybe I should go back, but what would I do? Who and what do I want to be? I have no idea. Should I stay at UTC or take this adventure on the road? Should I pull a Sarah Dodson and just start doing the vagabond thing until it slows down and the natural choice is to return to the daily grind? I don't know the answer. I wish I had some wise sage to give me guidance.

I got to see my favorite Jewels last night and it was lovely, but he really got me thinking about the state of one aspect of my life. Perhaps I should listen to my friends when they ALL tell me that what I am doing is a bad idea. Perhaps I should listen to myself when I say I am exhausted from having to constantly defend myself. Maybe I should consider that I have a weight on my heart from doubt and worry. Maybe I should open my ears and my eyes and do what I am sure is best.
I probably won't though.

There is probably much more to say here, but I'm going to let it go at this. I love you all.
x's and o's,
Hayley

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