I have learned a few things about myself on this journey to my homeland (or, you know, Gidget's) and I felt that it would be beneficial for all of you out there in blog-land to learn from my vast wisdom. I am sure you are thanking me as we speak. You're welcome.
#1. DIY highlights hurt like a bitch. It sounds like a great idea in theory, but in actual practice you will begin to wish you were doing something way more fun... like cutting off your hand with a rusty hacksaw.
#2. I will never understand how some people (like my mom's friend and one of our tripmates, Debbie) can stay out on the beach from 930 in the morning until sunset. I mean, I love the beach, I love to swim, I love having a rockin' awesome tan, but I have never been fond of soaking in a puddle of my own sweat. Some people are born with a high tolerance for yuck. I am not one of them.
#3. DIY HIGHLIGHT UPDATE: I look just like Destin Barbie. Only, you know, with smaller boobs and a larger ass.
#4. If your younger brother accompanies you on any sort of vacay, be prepared to constantly say "Shut up" "no YOU are" "No I will NOT give you any money" etc. Otherwise you will be more prone to beating yourself about the head with something heavy and blunt just to get the sound out.
#5. Yeah, so parting your hair at the beach is a bad plan. Part = exposed skin = most painful sunburn EVER. (Plus add #1 to this scenario and you are totally effed.)
#6. If there are cute frisbee throwing boys on the beach, do not forget the terrible tan lines on your stomach. Put on a shirt while you gawk in a not so obvious fashion (read: with your mouth hanging open like a cat stalking a bird bath). Just a rule of thumb.
#7. Overeating at the beach does not make you look sexier in a bikini. But guacamole is tasty.
#8. Chances are, if your skin is burning... your skin is burning. Put on more sunscreen, moron. Not that I would know.
#9. Reading a book with a dude dressed like Jesus on the cover gets you a lot of funny looks. I'm not sayin'. I'm just sayin'.
Well, I'm tired. Perhaps there will be more to come but for now, I need some fried pickles.
Have a lovely evening. You people are fab!